May? SERIOUSLY?!?

Seriously.

I’d known it had been a little bit, since I’d last posted, but May?

Sweet baby Christmas. Gawd, I guess that’s coming up soon too, huh?

I’ll just sum up the last few months by saying I had to work. A lot. Like I had 6 whole days off in the span of three months, a lot.

So much that I completely missed this happening and didn’t know about it until the next day, hearing about it from my Human Resources Manager and fellow Alex enthusiast.

But YAY! He should have won because every time he came on screen in that show, I physically cringed and couldn’t stand him. So you know that’s some A+ acting on his part.

Things at work have gone back to normal, so I’m trying to get back into the writing thing now that time is a thing I can use for things not work related.

Here’s hoping. 🙂

The Venefica & The Vampire – Chapter 25 – Exponentially Worse

Dating Vampires for Dummies – 2 – You Can’t Touch This 

Oy…

I didn’t mean to “go dark” for so long. Not that I ever mean to go dark – unless we’re talking about my roots, because then yes, I absolutely meant to go dark – but, yeah. Story of my life.

Speaking of stories…

A couple of weeks ago we made the six hour drive down to Virginia to see The Boy for the weekend.


This was pretty much my view of him the entire time.
Somewhat hazy and a little out of focus.

But in reality, it was more like we drove The Boy’s girlfriend down to Virginia, so they could disappear into her hotel room doing things I don’t want to know anything about, all on my dime.

10,000 dimes, to be more precise.

I only saw him during mealtimes. Next time I’m just gonna Skype him, while I eat a PB&J sandwich. He might make a Boo-Boo Face at me, but my smiling wallet will cancel it out.

While we were stuck in this STOP-IT-ALREADY-AND-JUST-GO! traffic just outside of Washington DC:

I began to reread this:

And then stopped, with only 3 chapters left.

Then, a few days ago, the stars aligned because Meg and I were talking about TV shows and she mentioned how much she loved This Is Us. I’ve heard nothing but good things, but I haven’t watched it.

Yet.

But I will. One day.

She declared her love of the character Jack, which had me declaring my lust for Milo Ventimiglia because HAWT! Which made me recall Milo is my visual muse for the Faepire, Ailill.


*cue lusty heart eyes*

Then four fucking days later Baby Daddy comes home and tells me:

“The cast from that TV show was in my office today. The one on the Today show.”

Suffice it to say, I didn’t know what in the hell he was talking about. Luckily for me, I learned to speak Baby Daddy like the natives going on 23 years ago and after a brief squinty-eyed hiccup over the difference between Lost and Heroes, I soon figured out he meant the cast of This Is Us was in his building, a mere twenty feet from his office door.

Which means MILO was a mere MILE from my office door.

Did Baby Daddy text me?
NO.

Did Baby Daddy call me?
NO.

Did Baby Daddy know of my fangirling over Milo Ventimiglia in particular?
Well, no.

But we’ve been together for going on 23 years now, so he should be able to know with one look the type of guy I would totally leave him for.

So I probably answered my own question there, but whatever.

He must’ve begged scraps from someone in the base media department because he brought home that autographed collage just yesterday in an effort to stop the death glares and snark that kept flying his way. I promptly mailed it off to Meg today because she is my Forever Love, while Baby Daddy is my First Husband.

 But that long ass drawn out story is to explain the who, what, when, where, why – all the wh’s – of how I got around to getting back to it. It being this fic.

Click the banner above to start over or clickety-click below to go to the newest chapter.

The Debt – Chapter Forty-Six – The Hollow 

So…

Within the first hour of Boss Man’s arrival, I managed to call him:

  • A dickface
  • An Asshole
  • A douchebag

Rinse and repeat for the remainder of the week.

All in all, I can say it went well.

So, when I was writing Meg’s Birthday fic, I’d gotten the That-Shit-Really-Happened online dating scenarios from one of the civilian lawyers from the JAG office on the military base we both work on, who – for the purposes of cyber anonymity – shall henceforth be referred to as Ape Junk.

And not for those reasons.

But it got me to thinking about fictional lawyers and what they might be up to which leads us to this.

Now, as for this next chapter of Manny 911, that has been sitting mostly finished in my Word docs for the last few months – because I suck – I feel I should preface it with…a LONG long time ago in a galaxy far, far awayMissyDee went to some Heroes and Villains DC Comics convention and she’d texted me pictures of some of the actors there, which led to a back and forth with me ‘yelling’ “That’s Oliver Queen! HE’S THE GREEN ARROW!”

Or something like that.

And then she watched a panel with some other actors from the show, with David Ramsey being one of them and the crux of the rest of our text convo devolved to me admitting I’d do him.

I would.

Just like calories on a Caribbean cruise, celebrities don’t count when it comes to committing adultery.

 But now you know who Sookie’s talking about when you read this:

Manny 911 – 18 – The ‘S’ is for Situations Dr. Seuss Should Have Schooled Us About

…Ahem *Taps Mic* Is this thing still on?

Um…so, hi!

(Shakes head at own lameness.)

Yeah, so I know it’s been (Christ. Months? Really?) a while since I last posted anything and I’m so sorry about that. I have my excuses, which for the most part are just that.

Excuses.

But the highlights in chronological order are:

  • That election (Just, no.)
  • Christmas (Seriously, just popped up out of nowhere. Thank God for Amazon Prime)
  • My doggie was diagnosed with Cushing’s Disease
  • Hubs and I spent a lovely night in the ER with him having what turned out to be a gall bladder attack
  • The Boy (Thing 1) joined the Army National Guard and left for Basic Training
  • The day The Boy left (on the dog’s 15th birthday) the dog went to the animal ER and had to be put to sleep 2 days later
  • Crying over the dog
  • Hubs had his gall bladder taken out (I’ve spent more time getting my hair done. Seriously. They’re quick.)
  • Crying over the dog
  • We had to drive to South Carolina for The Boy’s graduation from Basic Training
  • Crying over telling The Boy about the dog
  • Driving The Boy to Virginia for He’s in the Army Now – Part Deux Training
  • It’s Inspection Time (releases balloon drop and throws confetti) where I work, which is my segue to…

Why I’m posting Makesmyheadspin‘s Birthday Fic a day early.

Boss Man is driving down ’round these parts today, so I’ll be going in to work at the ass crack of dawn and schlepping around with him all week long. Hopefully I’ll have some time to work on the next chapter of something on Friday, but considering my track record as of late, I’m not making any promises.

Thanks to all of you that have sent Miss You’s and Are you dead? inquiries.

I’ve missed you too. And I’m not. 🙂

Click the banner below to take you to Meg’s birthday fic and wish My Sistah from another Mistah a Happy Birthday.

It’s nothing but unapologetic smutty fluff.
It’s smuff.

What can I say…

stucky

About the delay…

captain_america

Other than The Star Spangled Man…

america

Interfered with my posting plans.

really

did-you-write-that-down-first

Alright, well work interfered as well, but thank god for Walmart keeping ungodly hours, which meant I could swing by there and skirt the seedier side of the local population to pick up the newly released Captain America Civil War DVD.

And it was my patriotic duty to celebrate in the form of staging an epic battle on the dashboard of my sons’ car, using tiny action figures, for them to find.

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Because I’m that kind of fucking awesome mom.

language

Manny 911 – 17 – The ‘M’ is for Mood Swings and Their Wildly Meandering Paths to Marriage

Happy Labor Day Part Deux

To me.

Happy Labor Day to me, since 19 years ago at this very moment I was in active labor about to push out Thing 2.

So I guess, also, Happy Birthday to him. 🙂

Now, before my laptop battery dies on me, here’s a slight chapter spoiler via t-shirts:

lawyer-bamf

And:

stacys-mom

And last but not least, some obligatory Skarsporn:

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Boom. Done. Beat the battery dying.
*mic drop*

Manny 911 – 15 – The ‘F’ is for The First Rule of a Freddy versus Jason Free-For-All is to Feng Shui Off

It’s Sunday, so you know what that means…

It’s the day to celebrate Hammers, as dictated by Pastor Hammer Pants.

Or Mjolnir Day, if you happen to be a Norse God, which is much easier on the eyes than a 90’s Hammer Pants wearing rapper turned pastor.

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Loki taking one on the chin.

sup.png.png
Get your papers, phone cards, soda, water, cigarettes, and Norse gods here!

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Aww…little Steve Rogers pre-serum!

Speaking of Debbie Pelt – if, you know, you read the last Manny 911 chapter – here’s a stalker like pic I would totally take if the opportunity presented itself:

stalker-pics-i-would-take.png.png

Of course, I don’t know why he’d need a HOMEMAD COLD DR, but that’s his business.

Or so the courts would tell me.

Manny 911 – 13 – The ‘A’ is for A Decidedly Adult Accord has been Agreed Upon

HAMMER! Haaammmeeeerrrr….

Reason #5728415866853513418479 why I love the Marvel Cinematic Universe:

Now, some things you need to know about the next chapter.

  1. I used Google Translate for one line. If it’s wrong, blame Google.
  2. Some of you might not be happy with some…things that transpire. But that’s how the Cookie crumbles.
  3. You all have Kleannhouse (with TWO n’s) to thank/blame because she sent me this and I couldn’t resist working it into the chapter:
  4. ca-.jpg.jpeg
  5. Also, please note now that I’ve started numbering things I’ve accidentally activated the ALL THINGS SHALL BE NUMBERED setting WordPress must have.
  6. See?
  7. Numbered.
  8. Blame WordPress.

Manny 911 – 12 – The ‘O’ is for Oh Say Can You Sing