Answering my phone, I was greeted with, “You’re a dick.”
“You would know,” I smirked in return. “Just how many cocks have you sucked in your lifetime?”
I’d known Alasdair Mòr from nearly the time he’d been made vampire more than seven centuries earlier. His skill as a warrior was nearly as legendary as my own, but it wasn’t until he’d been promoted to be one of the Ancient Pythoness’ personal guards in his fifth century that we became close friends.
We were close enough to be brothers by the time I left, with him taking over my position as the head of the guard detail.
Which was why he could get away with calling me a dick.
“Enough to know one when I see one,” he replied. “If it walks like a dick and sounds like a dick, then it’s most likely a dick.”
“As enlightening as your tutorial on Cock Characterization is,” I smiled, with an eye roll he couldn’t see. “Is there a point to your call this evening that doesn’t have a cum-hole at the tip or are you simply that bored?”
Normally I wouldn’t care why he called and would gladly waste several hours getting caught up on the goings on in our world. But I was on my way to meet up with Sookie at some place in Monroe called Hooligans.
I couldn’t even begin to guess what kind of establishment it was, but it didn’t matter to me. Not only wouldn’t I beg off spending time with her, her off-handed remark a couple of nights earlier, saying it would provide me with a few more clues about how she’d gone from the girl I’d first met to the woman she’d undoubtedly become, I couldn’t refuse.
And I would admit – to myself, at least – I was coming to suspect there wasn’t much I would refuse her.
His Scottish accent, tinging his one word reply that – like his sexual preference – could go either way, told me he was worked up about something and being in a hurry, I asked, “Are you going to share with the class or do I get three guesses?”
I might have assumed the purpose of his call was work related. To tell me about some sort of new threat against either The Council or our kind and he wanted my help in routing out the assholes responsible.
I might have made that assumption if it hadn’t been for his dick-ish greeting.
My un-beating heart froze, with his one word reply that could only go one way in my narrow viewpoint.
Sookie was in danger.
Forgetting all about dick-ish greetings in Scottish accents, I searched for her through our blood tie. Thankfully, she hadn’t closed it off again since that night in her family’s homestead where she’d confessed her true identity.
And confessed her true motive for seeking me out.
But she worked for The Council, so it made sense Alasdair would know her given name.
How he would know we shared a blood tie was another matter – one that had the Ancient Pythoness’ name all over it – but I could only assume he had reason to believe she was in danger and I answered my assumption of his unspoken question with, “She feels fine.”
In more ways than one.
So I sent my own throb of want through our shared tie.
An unspoken, ‘On your mark…’ of sorts.
The weight of my foot on the accelerator doubled – and my cock grew heavier in between my legs – feeling the equivalent of ‘Get set…’ coming from her, but Scottish dicks reminded me of their existence by saying, “Yes, she does.”
“What?” my mouth asked, without my brain’s consent.
Had they shared blood too?
I hadn’t smelled any other supernatural blood on her. Not even when I’d only known her as Gus. But with her Fae lineage and her ability to shut down our own blood tie at will, I supposed she could have concealed anyone else’s blood flowing through her veins from me.
And I didn’t know what bothered me more.
The idea she’d shared blood with any other vampire – much less one I considered a brother – or the idea she’d kept that knowledge from me.
Our customs dictated any human who’d been given blood by another vampire was – in effect – claimed by that vampire.
But Sookie wasn’t human.
So in my mind, no one could truly claim her.
Least of all, not without her consent.
I was still pretending I had any control over my own actions – and reactions – when it came to her, so I’d purposely not gone down that road yet.
We were fucking.
The act itself – and she – was exquisite.
Two and two equaled four.
She and I equaled sixty-nine.
I’d seen no reason not to stick my head in her pussy and maintain my ‘If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,’ mindset.
So was the true purpose behind his call to tell me there was nothing to be fixed because he had already claimed Sookie as his own?
If he’d known her as well as I was coming to, he should have known about her ability to control the effects of vampire blood in her body. And being as close as brothers, it made sense he wouldn’t be angry at me for not knowing about any claim he had on her.
Even so – as close as brothers or not – the idea of Sookie being beholden to anyone other than me wasn’t sitting well.
If he hadn’t called me and instead had dropped by for a face to face meeting, the possibility existed I might have killed him in that moment.
As close as brothers or not.
So either he knew me well enough or his employer gave him fair warning and that was why he chose to make his claim via phone call.
As ridiculous as it sounded – even to my own mind – my connection to Sookie ran deeper than blood.
Deeper than the past that had brought our very first meeting about.
Deeper than the fuck-a-thons we’d had at every meeting since then.
…As spectacular as they were.
Proving he did in fact know me well, Alasdair’s teasing voice broke through my internal musings when he said, “Get a grip and loosen your grip on the steering wheel before you rip the bugger off. I’ve been told – and I quote – ‘To mind my own fucking business and it’s none of my business who she’s fucking.’”
He didn’t have to specify who ‘she’ was.
I didn’t even have to try very hard to imagine hearing her say that exact fucking phrase.
But before I could feel any amount of relief from his words, his next ones made sure I wouldn’t be getting any reprieve at all, when he went on to say, “But it is my business, even if she knows where I fucking rest for the day.”
Hearing those words – had we been face to face – I definitely would have killed him.
No matter the fact it was none of my fucking business who she was fucking either.
But not knowing his nights were numbered – or how irrational I could be when it came to her – he’d unwittingly spared himself from the blade of my sword when – ironically enough – he threatened me with his own.
“So the only thing I’m going to say brother,” he sighed. “Is if you hurt her, I will be forced to hurt you.”
Alasdair wasn’t one to get attached to many – or to humans at all – but his warning wasn’t all that surprising.
Sookie wasn’t all that human, after all.
And I wasn’t the only dick after all was said and done, when he bid me a good night, with a, “Slàinte!”
The fucker was wishing me good health.
Arriving at Hooligan’s, it wasn’t until I walked inside that I allowed myself to believe the truth of what I’d first balked at when I’d pulled into the parking lot.
This was most definitely a strip club.
Taking a seat at one of the tables off to the side, I first wondered if she was playing some sort of game by wanting to meet me there.
Testing me with tits and ass that weren’t hers, while she graded my actions like a disapproving schoolmarm.
But I dismissed the thought just as quickly.
Not only was she secure in who she was, she surely had to know by my reaction to her Lola that night at the club, no one could hold my attention like she could.
Guinness should really give her some sort of recognition for such a feat.
My next thought was maybe this was her way of cluing me into the fact she wanted another playmate for our playdates.
Threesomes – or even foursomes – were nothing new, but the thought of sharing her with anyone – even another woman – wasn’t titillating in the least.
Her tits were mine.
My claim on them only intensified even more so when I was in the same room with them.
But before my blood could come to a boil at the thought of anyone else trying to make her cum, our blood tie, while open still, I discovered the hard way had been muted.
I only knew it when I felt it explode in my veins – and one vein in particular nearly exploded in my pants – when my eyes were automatically drawn to the presence of someone coming to stand just to the side of my seat.
Dressed like the rest of the cocktease waitresses wandering around.
“Welcome to Hooligan’s,” she purred, while leaning over and giving me a good view of my assets. “My name is Lola and I’ll be serving you this evening.”
Oh Hell-No-Ell-Ay Lola…
My fangs snapping down cut into my lower lip, but there was no retracting them.
Me and my dick couldn’t decide.
Thankfully, I managed to keep them hidden from all but her as I questioned, “You moonlight. As a waitress. At a strip club.”
This was what she’d wanted to tell me?
The only thing it revealed was too much skin for too many eyes, all of whom had no business looking at any part of her.
That – and why she wasn’t uncomfortable walking around nearly naked.
“Only when I’m bored,” she laughed. “But I’m not really wor…”
Her words trailed off, with her eyes and attention trailing over towards the main entrance. The crowd was too large for me to see who – if anyone – she’d noticed coming in, from where I was sitting.
But I had a difficult time obeying her command when she said, “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”
And I had a difficult time holding still, when she spun back around and landed on my lap, rubbing her body all over mine.
Her only explanation had been a wink and a smile.
Something I’d learned on our second first meeting that meant she was up to no good.
She disappeared into the crowd and only moments later my searching eyes found her.
Being pulled off to one side of the club, by none other than Bill Compton.
Forgetting all about her fairy teleporting powers, I was on my feet and feet away from his back when I felt her push something akin to patience through our blood tie.
I was feeling too impatient, wanting to detach his head from his shoulders for daring to touch her, to be sure.
Moving to the left, I angled myself to be able to see both of their faces and from what I could see, I was sure he was attempting to glamour her.
And I was positively livid hearing him say in a low hypnotic tone, “You don’t fear me. You want to come with me now.”
“I don’t fear you,” she droned back at him in return, in a way that had my foot lifting up.
Because if that wasn’t the final ‘Go’ to our earlier game, then I didn’t know what was.
But I stayed that same foot from barreling me towards them, hearing her voice return to its normal tone, when she added, “But I sure as hell don’t want to come with you now or ever. And I do mean that in every sense of the word. Now tell me something, did your Maker command you keep those sideburns or did you lose a bet?”
I held in my snort – barely – but a drop of pre-cum managed to make its way out of my dick, when her response to his gobsmacked expression was to stare straight into his faulty-glamouring eyes and say, “I belong to Eric Northman.”
“You’re goddamn right, you do,” I added, appearing at her side a second later, before I even knew I’d decided to move.
But hearing her declare she was mine felt like…
Something I had no words for.
But I did know it felt right.
So I could only hope that she’d really meant it and not meant to use it as a way to disentangle herself from Confederate Cunts.
But the fact remained – she’d said it.
So I held onto that fact because possession was nine-tenths of the law and as soon as I had her in my grasp and away from prying eyes, I wanted to bite her and fuck her and rub myself all over her in celebration.
So I would.
As soon as I reminded Compton my name was Northman.
And the fact the North had once again defeated the South.
“I know you’re original mode of transportation was a horse and buggy,” Sookie offered, not bothering to hide her contempt. Then hiding her – my – chest by crossing her arms, she ended with, “But could you point your buggy-eyed stare somewhere else?”
My eyes shot to his, with my body moving to shield hers, hearing his fangs snap down at her insolence. But he’d had the wisdom to take a step back, putting more distance between them, and keeping his eyes trained on the floor at his feet.
I had plans for Sookie that evening that didn’t involve utilizing her contractual cleaning duties, but I would have ended him then and there if he’d given the slightest inkling he meant to do her any harm.
She was mine.
She’d just said so.
And while she cleaned, I could use the time to glamour all of the humans to forget about the vampire dick measuring contest they would have been witness to.
But I would have given Sookie a celebratory fuck with the winning dick when we were both done with our chores.
And I still would.
Lifting only his eyes, they met mine, while he spoke at a pace and decibel only a supernatural would be able to discern, when he said, “I was sent by the queen to procure her. She took notice of the girl at the summit and has had me searching for her ever since. You have no choice but to relinquish your claim.”
“No choice?” I questioned mockingly, taking a small step forward and smiling at the thought of such a thing.
Even without me claiming Sookie, she’d already been claimed by The Council.
The Council trumped queens every day of the week.
But that knowledge should only be revealed as a last resort. And this situation wasn’t even a next to last resort.
Already afforded the full protection of The Council, I could kill both him and his queen and not face any backlash.
But I would definitely face some backsplash when I took out the Berts.
Big Saxon fuckers.
Maybe I could find a way to take out two Berts with one stone. From a distance.
Setting all that aside for now, I agreed, “You are correct. I have no choice, for it is she who has claimed me.”
A truth I hadn’t even really admitted to myself until the words fell through my lips. Meant to taunt him, they only taunted me with their veracity.
Not knowing she’d just won another record Guinness should acknowledge, Sookie chimed up from behind me, using both hands to grab on and say, “It’s this ass.”
Kneading it, like she might get fresh bread later on for her troubles, she added, “You all supposedly don’t change, after the change, but every time I see it, I swear it’s gotten better.”
“Northman,” Captain Cuntfederate spoke up, interrupting Sookie’s soliloquy of my sexiness. “You are wasting time. The queen will get her way one way or the other.”
Tired of wasting time – mine and Sookie’s time that could be spent fucking, instead of tooling around with this tool – I stared back at him and warned, “Tell your queen to stand down or she will most definitely get hers one way or the other. The girl is mine.”
Showing she wasn’t intimidated in the least – and showing just how insolent she could be – Sookie’s head peered around my side from where she stood, still shielded by my body in front of hers, and grinned, “It’s my tits. Every time he sees them, he swears they’ve gotten better.”
“Every part of you is magical, Lover,” I smiled in return.
“You are willing to incur the wrath of a monarch over a human?” he hissed.
Hissed over her insolence, my refusal, or his fear of Leclerq when he returned empty handed, I had no clue.
I also had no fucks to give.
I had plenty of fucks to give Sookie.
Which was why I put an end to his blathering by pulling his face to mine, with my hand using the front of his shirt as my oh-shit-handlebar, and stated unequivocally, “Tell your monarch I am willing to decimate her entire kingdom, if she dares to even impede traffic by getting hit by a semi, when my lover is out running her errands.”
Then releasing him from my grasp, I smoothed out the wrinkles I’d made in his shirt, while smiling, “She hates to wait in traffic.”
“Idling engines are destroying our ozone,” she nodded on cue.
But with the scent of confederate cunts caught in my nose hairs, I was reminded of another.
A ginger haired cunt, with an affinity for truckers.
“Tell me Bill,” I began and was cut off by Sookie’s snort of, “Seriously? That’s his name? Vampire Bill? From those sideburns, I would have guessed Ezekiel or Jedediah. Bill…how lame. But they say you can tell a lot about man by his name, so it makes sense.”
I could tell by the scathing look on his face, if I hadn’t been there, he would have attacked her. But not knowing her name, title, or lineage, he had no idea how deadly that would be for him.
And I didn’t see the point of warning him off any more than I already had.
She was mine. That should be enough to make him stand down.
He could learn that lesson the hard way, if he chose to make a move against her.
But I drew his attention back to me by saying, “I guess congratulations are in order.”
And at his confused expression, I added, “It’s a girl!”
He paled even more than his normally pasty hue and I forced myself to not grin, hearing Sookie snicker with her whisper of, “I didn’t know you all could still feel constipated.”
“You have left her unattended long enough for her to leave a trail of bodies in her wake and according to the documents provided to me by The Council, as her Maker you have not paid the required fee.”
“You speak of our affairs in front of a human?” he deflected, with his eyes darting towards the door.
Little did he know, I wasn’t going to pursue his misdeeds this evening and was hoping he would make a run for it.
I had a celebratory fuck to commence.
“I speak of this as an Enforcer for The Council,” I reminded him. “You have broken our laws. Any protection you believe you possess by being the procurer to a monarch only exists in your own mind. You have one week to pay the turning fee.”
And seeing the calculating look in his eyes, I knew where his thoughts had strayed, so I added, “No matter if she lives for another hundred years or is ended by your own hand tonight. The fact remains. You turned her.”
Then turning his earlier threat back onto him, I promised, “Your debt will be collected one way or the other.”
He left with a sniveling look and a huff, now having more than he’d bargained for by showing up here tonight and leaving without Sookie in tow.
It really was a good night.
And it was looking to get even better when Sookie dragged me down a hallway and shoved her body against mine.
Running her hands up my chest, her pupils ate her irises as she shoved me through a door and groaned, “God, you’re so sexy when you get all growly.”
Knocking into something, I tripped over something else and realized we were in a broom closet.
Pushing my back up against the wall, her hands were already going for the zipper on my pants, while I chuckled out, “You want to fuck in the janitor’s closet?”
It made no difference to me because I wasn’t too keen on waiting until we got somewhere else either.
And perhaps – one day – I would recall all that she could do, because I was still surprised when she reached in to take ahold of my cock, while laughing out her response of, “Not even a little bit.”
Surprised – because we were suddenly in a bedroom.
One I hadn’t been in before, but she most definitely had.
Her scent was everywhere.
The floor to ceiling glass windows could be problematic for me later on, but for now they showed the unmistakable nighttime skyline of New York City.
So my blond was showing when I heard myself ask, “Where are we?”
Thankfully she didn’t call me out on my keen observation skills and only replied, “My apartment.”
Then asking a question of her own, she added, “Now, where were we?”
Her hand grasping onto my cock had me panting out, “There. We were right there.”
By the end of the night we’d also been to her kitchen, her shower, her living room, back to her shower, and then back in her bed.
I could feel the sun rising in the east, even though only the faintest hint of pink was lining the horizon. But before I could say anything about needing to find a suitable resting place, she reached out and grabbed a remote from her nightstand.
Metal shades slid down, throwing the room into pitch black darkness, as she sleepily mumbled, “You’re safe.”
In a way, those two words were quickly becoming synonymous with three other words.
A concept I couldn’t even begin to contemplate, much less grasp, in the little time left in the night.
So I ignored them and brought up the other thing that still didn’t make any sense to me.
“Why do you moonlight as a waitress at a strip club?”
Laughing, she turned over and smiled, “I don’t. The club belongs to my cousins. My other cousins.”
As in her fairy cousins.
But I didn’t have to ask for her to explain, “After the attack, I needed some time to heal. By the time I was good to go, they moved here and bought a place in Monroe so I could be close to home, but not too close and I stayed with them until I was ready to venture out on my own. They helped me a lot. Fairies…something about being physically close to those who share your blood helps to heal whatever ails you.”
The same could be said about the effect having her close had on me.
Not that I was about to say it out loud.
So I ignored that too and instead decided to get one more answer from her, while I still had my wits about me.
“Tell me,” I whispered, nuzzling my lips against the spot I’d found just underneath her left ear and smiled at the goose bumps that rose up on her skin from my actions. “Why did Alasdair feel the need to threaten me with bodily harm if I hurt you?”
“Other than the fact his mouth is so big from all of the dicks he’s sucked?” she giggled.
Then turning her body so that hers ended up on top of mine, she pressed her lips to my own and promised, “That is a story for another night.”
Surprisingly, that answer was good enough for me.
But I was coming to learn everything about her was surprising to me.
And that was fine by me too.