Chapter 12 – Change



He loves me! Deep down inside I knew it before he’d ever said the words, but a part of me was scared just the same that maybe I was the only one that had fallen in love. It would have been impossible not to. Everything about him, aside from the whole someone is out to kill him/memory loss thing, was perfect. Or, at least, perfect for me.

Never in my life had I felt more cared for and valued than I did by Eric. I could tell by the way he looked at me that I was his whole world and while I knew that I made him happy I couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps the only reason was because I was his whole world. Without his memories of his former life I was the one person in the world that truly knew him now. Even the friends he had made since we’d arrived in Bon Temps didn’t know the real Eric. I was the only one and that fact caused both warmth and pity to fill my heart. I know he’d said he didn’t care if his memories never returned, but I knew better.

It was hard to miss the fact that he sometimes had nightmares given that our bodies were always wrapped up in each other’s every night, but he never mentioned anything about having them. I’d hoped he would one day confide in me, but in the meantime I always made sure I was extra affectionate the on days after he’d experienced them. And more than once in our quiet times together I’d see him with a detached yet frustrated stare knowing he was trying to remember something, anything, and in those moments I would give or do anything to be able to give him his memories back.

He’d seemed obsessed in the beginning when he started training me on how to protect myself. I knew the thought of me getting hurt because of him wasn’t something he would willingly let happen, but it was out of his control much like everything else he’d had to deal with since he awoke with no memories. His only option, our only option, was to do whatever we could to prepare ourselves in every way possible and it wasn’t something either one of us took lightly.

I had always considered myself relatively physically fit and having grown up Jason Stackhouse’s sister I felt I could hold my own if push came to shove. But now I felt not only strong, but powerful. Eric’s training changed my thought processes and reactions which only made me wonder just what exactly he’d gone through in his other life to be capable of everything that seemed second nature to him. In the months that we’d spent together I sometimes found it hard to reconcile the sweet, gentle, passionate man I had fallen in love with and the lethal killer I knew he could be. They were two very different sides of Eric Northman, but I loved them both knowing it was the sum of both parts that made him whole.

Once those three little words, or four in my case, were finally spoken I felt a tension leave my body that I hadn’t known existed. What insecurities I’d been holding onto left me in that moment having been replaced with complete and utter certainty that Eric was who I was meant to be with. Every choice I’d made, no matter how questionable they’d seemed at the time, were the right ones to make because they’d led me to this moment in time embraced in the arms of the man I loved and who loved me back. A small part of me wished that we could one day take the next step in our relationship and perhaps get married, but if we never had more than what we had right now for the rest of our days I knew I would die happy and content without any regrets.

Speaking of happy, I could feel Eric’s happiness pressing against my inner thigh. I might even venture to say he was downright ecstatic. We’d been together for seven months now and I still couldn’t get enough of him. We’d had sex in every room of the house and at more than a few locations outside the house, but it hadn’t gotten old. We knew what drove each other wild and put our knowledge to good use daily, but while we were now very familiar with one another it was somehow still very new each and every time. There was always something new I would discover about him in those intimate moments whether it was a look he would give me or a sound he would make that would make my toes curl. I was always momentarily shocked at his size every time he entered my body and given the grunts and groans that always left Eric’s lips I would guess he felt the same.

We were well on our way to happy naked times under the Christmas tree when I heard the phone ring. I’d been in sexual relationships in the past where I’d sometimes mentally drift to other things in the moment like whether or not I had to do laundry or making a mental shopping list, but that never happened with Eric. His seemingly inherent skill in all things extended to his undeniably pure sexual prowess as well and it was only because we had barely started that I’d been able to register the message Octavia was leaving on our answering machine. My entire body tensed as I realized what she’d said, but I knew by the way Eric was acting he was singularly focused on getting our clothes off.

I finally stilled his hands saying, “Eric, didn’t you hear that?” I already knew the answer but waited for his response anyway.

“No Lover, I was a little preoccupied with getting you naked. Whoever it was, they can wait.” He tried to kiss me into submission, which I’ll admit that my track record proves that tactic has worked for him well in the past, but I couldn’t be swayed now. Not when it came to finally having the opportunity to maybe learn something about his past.

I finally pulled back enough to whisper yell, “Eric! That was Octavia. She said Mr. Compton’s nephew called saying he was in the area and he’s on his way over there now!” I can only guess it was our state of near nakedness that had me whisper yelling even though there was no one anywhere nearby that could’ve heard me screaming bloody murder. Kind of like how I felt the need to whisper whenever I was in a bookstore as if I were in the library. Once Eric figured that out he enjoyed yelling for me from across the store just to make me cringe. He finally stopped when I yelled back that I was looking at books for him on how to please a woman. I paid for that comment later, but it was worth it.

Eric’s hands finally stopped and for the longest moment we silently stared at each other. I had a feeling that everything was about to change, but whether or not it was for the better I had no idea. I could tell he was struggling with something internally and I had a sneaking suspicion it was his fear of me getting hurt coupled with his desire to keep me happy in the little world that we’d created together that kept him from leaping off of the floor and running across the cemetery. I didn’t want him to have to struggle with this on my account. I could never, would never keep him from doing whatever needed to be done to find the truth.

Sighing, he brushed a strand of hair away from my face and said, “I meant what I said before Sookie, we can just stay here and be happy, together.”

I could tell by the tone of his voice that it pained him to say it and I knew I had to be strong for him no matter how much I wanted to hide him away in the bunker he’d built until the coast was clear. My conscience would never allow it anyway so I sucked it up and said, “We’ll still be together, no matter what.” I believed what I’d said with every fiber of my being and I reached up to cup his face in the palm of my hand while he closed his eyes leaning into it causing me to reign in the sudden urge to cry. Instead I waited for his eyes to open and confessed, “I love you and no matter what we find out that will never change.”

“I love you too,” he whispered as he leaned down to give me a gentle but passionate kiss.

A tear escaped from my eye as a bad feeling started to grow in the pit of my stomach, but I attributed it to the unknown ‘William/Bill Compton’ that we were about to finally be able to put a face with the name. I wiped away the evidence of it before Eric could see and when he pulled back I forced myself to say, “We should probably get going before we miss him.”

Eric’s face remained as still as a stone, but there was an entire storm brewing behind his eyes. He looked more lost in that moment than I’d ever seen before, even when he first woke up with no memories, and I would’ve given anything to have been able to read his mind just then. Although the urge to ask him what he was thinking was rapidly becoming a losing battle, I stayed quiet knowing he needed the time to work through whatever he was feeling. The look of determination had just come into his eyes when he said, “You’re right, we should probably get going before we miss him.”

Only instead of standing up Eric’s lips crashed onto mine demanding I yield to him which I readily did. It was unexpected, but I quickly became consumed with my need for him. The change lingering on the horizon was palpable, like a living entity all on its own and it seemed that both of us needed to reaffirm what was between us before we went in search of what would become of us. What had started out as a gentle and playful romp under the Christmas tree after admitting our true feelings for one another was now a forceful, if not desperate, claiming of each other. He was mine and no one would harm him no matter the cost and I had no doubt that he felt the exact same way.

Since our clothes were already halfway off it only took a few seconds to kick our pants the rest of the way down our bodies and without bothering to remove our shirts Eric was inside of me in one powerful thrust. I cried out in relief not knowing just how incomplete I’d felt only seconds before. He was truly my other half and I knew that would never change.

Our pace was fast and hard and I was sure there would be bruises left on my hips from where Eric’s fingertips gripped my skin, but I didn’t care. I wanted the bruises because they would show that I was his in every way.

I found out Eric’s thoughts were in line with mine when he broke our kiss growling out, “Fuck Sookie, you’re mine. Say it! No matter what! Say it!”

“I’m yours,” I gasped out. “No matter what, I’m yours. Aahh…Eric..I love you.” I barely got the words out as my orgasm washed over me with my inner muscles clamping down on Eric pulling his own orgasm from him. His body covered mine like my very own shield and his face was buried in the side of my neck so I could both feel and hear his breathing and heart rate gradually slow down.

After a minute or two he pulled back and looked me in the eyes saying, “I love you too Sookie.” It took everything I had not to burst into tears seeing the sincerity in his eyes, but I knew now wasn’t the time for that. I needed to be strong for him knowing we were about to go searching for answers we might not want to find.

We reluctantly stood up and fixed our clothing and after Eric grabbed his gun and a couple of daggers, tucking them into his pants, we stepped out onto the porch and headed towards Mr. Compton’s house on foot across the cemetery. We stopped next to Gran’s grave and could see that it was still only Octavia’s car in the driveway so he hadn’t arrived yet. We spent the time while waiting for him trying to come up with several different plans on trying to get some information. In my opinion the best one had me knocking on the door alone under the guise of coming to visit with Octavia and striking up a conversation with Bill. Eric could watch from the tree line and would be able to see him perfectly well in either the doorway or the living room through one of the windows if we happened to speak in there.

Eric thought it was too dangerous, but it wasn’t like he could go up to him to make small talk. No matter what, we had already decided that we would be following him when he left the house knowing we’d never get another opportunity like this again. We kept a bag packed with clothing, cash and weapons that was ready to go at all times (another one of Eric’s handy but weird quirks) so we’d only have to run back across the field and grab the bag and the car to be ready to go.

We were still disagreeing on whether or not I should try and speak to Bill when the sight of headlights coming down Compton’s driveway had us both quieting. The moon was nothing more than a sliver in the sky, but we were still able to move with relative ease staying under the cover of the trees with all of Eric’s nighttime training he’d insisted I go through coming into play. When the car came to a stop in front of the house we came to a stop as well.

We silently watched as the door opened and a man in a suit stepped out of the car. The outdoor lights illuminating the front of the house made it easy to see him and I recognized him as the pompous ass I’d met years earlier. He looked basically the same with his brown hair and stiff facial features although now it looked as though he’d aged twenty years instead of the six or seven that had actually passed with him sporting patches of premature graying at his temples and harsh lines across his forehead. He also grew ridiculously large sideburns that made him appear even older.

I held my breath as Bill stood still seeming to take in his surroundings before walking towards the passenger side door, removing his suit jacket, and placing it on the passenger seat. While the door was open his briefcase could clearly by seen sitting on the passenger floorboard. The chime and flashing of his headlights signaled the doors had been locked and the alarm engaged before he climbed the steps finding Octavia waiting for him with the front door open. After introductions were made Bill stepped inside and the door was closed.

I turned towards Eric and whispered, “Do you think you can get inside of his car without setting off the alarm?”

His reply was a cocked eyebrow and a look saying, ‘What do you think?’ before saying, “We have no idea of how long he’ll be inside so it’s not a good idea.”

“If I went in there and distracted him for a little bit you’d have more time,” I replied a little irritated.

“I won’t be able to get to you right away if he tries anything,” he replied just as irritated.

“What do you think he’s gonna do, drain all of the blood from my body with Octavia right there? If he knew who I was and that you were here with me, do you really think he’d be taking the time to visit his sick uncle?” I knew Eric was just being overprotective, but sometimes I didn’t know if I wanted to kiss him of smack him upside the back of his head.

His silence either meant he was considering my last statement or he was thinking about smacking me upside the head, but I knew he relented when his shoulders sagged and he pulled a sheathed dagger from his pants pocket and handed it to me saying, “Try to stay more than arm’s length from him and keep your eyes on him at all times. I mean it Sookie.”

I could see how difficult it was for him to agree and I pulled him down placing a kiss on his lips saying, “I will.”

The look of determination appeared on his face again before saying, “I won’t need more than five minutes tops, but if it looks like he’s onto you then I want you to get out of there immediately.”

“Got it. Five minutes and if it looks like he’s about to go apeshit I should run like the girl that I am.” My attempt at injecting a little bit of levity into the situation went over like a lead balloon so I hid the dagger in my waistband with a sigh and turned towards the house, but before I could take one step Eric pulled me back into his arms and kissed me like he was saying farewell before going off to war.

It scared me.

Once he pulled back and I got my wits about me again I made my way towards the house and approached the front door. I took a deep breath and tried to put on an innocent neighborly expression, but I barely had it in place when the door opened before I could knock.

Bill stood there staring at me while I firmly affixed my ‘Crazy Sookie’ smile on my face that automatically happened whenever I was nervous with neither one of us saying a word. He finally broke the silence asking, “May I help you?”

His voice was speaking to me, but his eyes were speaking to my breasts. Pig, I thought, but I decided to use it to my advantage, changing my original plan from being the innocent neighbor to the neighbor with questionable morals, and leaned to one side while twirling my hair around my finger. I infused my voice with as much flirtiness as I could muster and said, “Hi! I was just coming to visit with Octavia.” I swallowed hard over what I was about to do and did my best to eyefuck him without gagging while asking, “Haven’t we met before?”

I swear, I could feel Eric’s eyes boring into the back of my head, but I pushed the feeling away so I could concentrate on the man in front of me. Lord help me.


One comment on “Chapter 12 – Change

  1. kleannhouse says:

    Crazy Sookie , Huh, it might work in her favor… that was a great chapter….. KY

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