Chapter 41

SPOV

While I lay there in post coital bliss listening to the sound of Eric’s breathing as he slept I tried to work up the shameful feelings I thought I should have, but it was an impossible task. I couldn’t even be angry at Wicked and Immoral for their wayward ways because thanks to them, Eric had given me the best orgasm of my life. If his hands were that talented, I could only imagine what other abilities he had in his repertoire and I already knew what symbol he could use in place of his name; an ‘O’ face. As my eyes got heavier with the Sandman on his way, I inhaled deeply, completely blissed out by Eric’s scent surrounding me and snuggled even closer to him in the bed he’d only ever shared with me. I fell asleep with a smile on my face recalling my thoughts from a few days earlier of me fighting some random woman over Eric on The Jerry Springer Show. Who knew I would’ve been the crack whore?

I woke up the following morning, thankful for my body’s internal alarm clock, in the same exact position I’d fallen asleep in. It was odd considering I usually flopped all over the bed in my sleep, but I didn’t know if it was because of Eric’s still vice-like grip on my body or the undeniable fact of how much his sheer presence calmed me. It was too early for me to analyze anything too deep and as I attempted to stretch my body I felt my early morning greeter knocking in the vicinity of my backdoor while Eric still slept unaware. When Wicked had introduced herself the night before in a wanton ‘How do you do?’ I realized how wrong I’d been comparing it to the Kraken and unicorns. Nessie, the Loch Ness Monster, was no longer a modern day myth and I could only hope to, one day soon, have it sinking into my own deep abyss. God knows he had the ability to make it wet enough.

It wasn’t much longer when my bladder demanded I get up and as I struggled to remove myself from Eric’s grasp I had a moment of déjà vu when he tightened his hold, growling low in his chest. My whole body shivered upon hearing it and it reminded me of his previous night’s dirty talk that shot my libido clear up into the stratosphere. Who needs flowery words and poetry when you can hear that instead?

I was pretty sure my panties were damp from something other than pee, but that wouldn’t be the case for much longer so I continued trying to free myself wondering if I would need the Jaws of Life. Eric refused to release me, even in slumber, and while it was cute I didn’t think he’d appreciate waking up to a golden shower. He’d never ask me back into his bed again.

I couldn’t even loosen his arms enough to turn around to face him so I was left with whispering, “Eric!”

Nothing.

If I didn’t know better I’d think he was dead, but I could clearly feel his pulse up against my ass. The Wonder Twins were of no use to me at the moment so I had to get creative and rubbed my ass against Nessie hoping it would rouse the rest of Eric. It took a moment, but more parts of him finally came to life as his arms held me tighter with Nessie seeking out a place to hide from prying eyes. I knew it was a gamble provoking him that way, but like a big rig with a double clutch engine Eric’s initially tighter grip loosened so his hands could make their way to my hips and I quickly rolled away from him, nearly falling off of the other side of the bed while his hands stretched out across the now empty mattress beside him, too slow to catch me.

“Where are you going?” he asked with his voice still hoarse from waking.

Seeing him lying there in nothing but his pajama pants with his hair all messy and his eyes half opened, I couldn’t remember for a moment why I had been so desperate to get away from him. My bladder soon reminded me, as did the time, and I scooted off the bed saying, “I have to get ready for work.” I wanted to give him a quick kiss before leaving the room, but I had a feeling he would find a way to convince me to stay so I ran back to my room to get ready.

I found Eric in the kitchen a little while later, freshly showered, but wearing a weird look. I hoped it didn’t have anything to do with our slap and tickle session from the night before, so I attempted to assess his mood by saying, “Good morning.”

“Is it?” he asked.

According to my Eric radar the forecast called for a shitty morning.

His words stung and I wondered where the affectionate Eric of the night before had gone to, thinking that part of him might have been left in that towel he’d tossed onto his bedroom floor. “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked with a little more sharpness in my tone than I’d meant to use.

I watched him shake his head and he dropped his gaze saying, “Nothing.” I was about to ask him what was wrong, but he knocked the question right out of my head when he spoke up instead. “Pam is coming by tonight at six to pick you up to go shopping for a dress for the premier tomorrow night.”

His tone was one that was meant to broker no argument which naturally made me argumentative. “Oh really…did anyone think to ask me or am I just supposed to obey?”

Eric grabbed his keys from the counter and headed out the door saying, “Do what you want Sookie. You’re going to anyway.”

I heard his car start up a minute later and drive away moments later while I stood in the kitchen trying to hold back the tears wondering what in the hell just happened. Thankfully my day at the school was busy enough to keep my mind from wandering to Eric too much since the first day of school would be the following day. Sam was friendly as usual, but when my eyes welled up when he asked about Eric he quickly changed the subject so I didn’t have to answer. I arrived home to an empty house having no idea when Eric would be home, since we hadn’t had a chance to discuss it, and was still sitting in a fog at the kitchen table, going back and forth between feelings of hurt and anger when Pam walked into the house at six o’clock on the dot.

“Ready?” she asked.

I stood up on autopilot and grabbed my things following her out to her car without any response. We sat in silence while she drove us to Beverly Hills with me staring out the window and it wasn’t until she parked when she finally asked, “What is it? Are you premenstrual or pissed I’m making you get a new dress? I can send someone out for chocolate and look for an empire waist dress if you’re bloated, but you’re shit out of luck if you’re just bitchy over having to shop.”

I glared at her before getting out of the car and looked up seeing we were standing in front of the Dolce & Gabbana store. There were a few paparazzi milling about, but Pam pulled me inside as I turned to her and said, “I can’t afford to shop here Pam. I have a perfectly acceptable dress at home.” I wasn’t sure how factual my declaration was, but if I was wrong I could always raid Amelia’s closet.

“Cutesy little sundresses aren’t appropriate for tomorrow night and don’t be ridiculous,” she chided. “We’re spending Eric’s money.”

She may as well have tossed me into a pit of quick drying concrete because my entire body stopped moving as I gritted out through my teeth, “I am not spending Eric’s money.” My hurt was giving way to anger at the moment over his attitude from that morning and I’d be damned if I was going to go gallivanting through some high end boutique shopping with his money.

“Are you still pretending you’re living on a shoestring budget? You’re Mrs. Eric Northman and you’re sure as hell going to look like it when you’re standing next to him.”

We were already attracting attention by the salespeople, whether it be from them working off of a commission or because of the paparazzi waiting outside, so I refrained from saying my thoughts out loud.

I’m Mrs. Eric Northman in NAME only.

Other than that one truth I had no idea where we stood. All day long I kept trying to figure out what had him in such a bad mood when I had walked into the kitchen that morning and the only conclusion I could come up with was he’d finally gotten what he’d wanted from me and was done pretending like he actually cared. Since we hadn’t actually had sex the hand job I gave him must not have been good enough for him to want to go any further. I was a fool to think my limited sexual experience could satisfy someone like Eric and an even bigger fool to think he’d want anything more from me than getting his rocks off.

Hurt and anger were still warring inside of me, fighting over which one of them would finally win out, when Pam shoved a pile of dresses into my arms and pushed me into a fitting room before I could utter a word. I stood there with an armful of couture unsure of what I was going to do when my cell phone rang. I dropped the thousands of dollars worth of dresses onto the floor without thought and grabbed my cell from my purse with my disappointment showing in the mirror in front of me seeing it wasn’t Eric calling, but Gran.

“Hi Gran,” I answered trying to sound happy when I was anything but.

“Hello sweetheart. I know it’s not the weekend yet, but I just wanted to call and wish you good luck on your first day of school tomorrow.”

“Thanks Gran.”

Clearly my acting skills were lacking because Gran picked up on my mood asking, “Is everything alright?”

No. “Yes.”

“Sookie, I know I raised you better than to lie to your elders. What is it? Are you worried about tomorrow?”

I didn’t think it was appropriate to discuss with my Grandmother my pitiful bedroom skills in not satisfying Eric, so I continued barreling down the road to Hell by lying, “Nothing’s wrong.”

Pam chose that moment to pound on the door saying, “I’m not getting any younger out here!”

When Gran asked who she’d heard I answered, “That’s Pam. She works for Eric and she took me shopping for a dress for some party thing we have to go to tomorrow night.” I kicked the pile of dresses at my feet out of spite, but only succeeded in making myself feel even worse.

“Is that what’s wrong? Don’t worry sweetheart. You just stand tall and proud next to your husband and don’t think about all of the people around you. I know you don’t like being the center of attention, but you’ll do fine.”

Great. I hadn’t even thought about the fucking circus that would surround us the following night and now I didn’t even have Eric to lean on anymore, at least not emotionally. Pam banged on the door again and Gran took that as her cue to let me off of the phone. I couldn’t bring myself to try on anything, but since Pam obviously had no boundaries she came into the fitting room without even knocking asking, “What’s the hold up? I don’t have all night.” She spotted the pile of clothing on the floor and looked back at me nonplussed by my sloppiness inquiring, “Do they not fit?”

“I wouldn’t know. I didn’t try any of them on.”

Pam’s hands moved with lightening speed as she lifted my shirt from my body without me ever seeing her move and my hands immediately moved to cover my bra clad breasts as I gasped, “Pam! What do you think you’re doing?”

“Please…you don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.” I wasn’t so sure about that statement given the way her eyes raked over my body and she licked her lips as her hands moved to my waistband to remove my pants, but I smacked her hands away. Her eyefuck turned into a glare as she said, “I have other things to do so you need to find something to wear so we can get out of here.”

“Fine!” I snapped back grabbing the first dress I laid hands on and pulled it over my head. We took turns finding something wrong with dress after dress with Pam coming and going with what had to be every item in the store. After a few hours had passed I didn’t care anymore, wanting nothing more than to leave, and I’d just about given up hope of finding anything when I put on a silky black halter style dress with large white polka dots. The full skirt flared from underneath my breasts with the ruffled hem falling just above my knees.

“That’s the one,” Pam said. “It wouldn’t be formal enough for an awards show, but it’s perfect for tomorrow night.”

I did like it, but the thought of having to suffer through a whole night of fake smiles with people I didn’t even know made me sick. I wasn’t sure if I could stomach however long we’d have to be there, much less the remaining 359 days Eric and I were supposed to spend together, and cursed myself for letting my guard down so quickly. The intimacy we’d shared the night before was bad enough, so my only silver lining was that we hadn’t actually had sex. My heart was hurting bad enough already.

I was going to put the dress and shoes Pam insisted were necessary on a credit card, refusing to allow her to pay for it with Eric’s money, until she finally stomped her foot saying I could consider it a wedding present from her. We were close to an all out fight and with the paparazzi poised with their camera lenses pointed through the glass storefront I finally backed down having had enough drama in my life at the moment.

It was after ten when she finally dropped me off at the house and I cautiously entered it not knowing what, if anything, I would say when I saw Eric. It turned out my worries were for nothing because when I didn’t see him in any room in the downstairs I checked the garage for his car and seeing it there let me know he was in the house somewhere. I quietly made my way upstairs and stood in front of his closed bedroom door for the longest time remembering how happy I’d been the night before, but I eventually went into my own room, taking my purchases along with my foolish notions with me, and cried myself to sleep.