Chapter 3 – Lost in Translation


That fire was back to burning in my belly and all I wanted to do was bite the woman in front of me, but the fear over what happened the last time I did that with the man Eric-er had stolen his clothes from made me hold back.

You’d think I’d be more hesitant over wanting to bite her at all.

Weird ass dream.

I knew he couldn’t understand me and I still couldn’t understand every part of my dream after the sex – the sex I could absolutely understand – so it wasn’t surprising when he cocked his head like a schnauzer hearing a whistle at my question. But instead of feeling that strange compulsion again – that for some reason I wanted to attribute to him, but couldn’t explain why – he held out his hand for me to take. When I did, he pulled me closer to the woman so I could watch as he leaned down and slowly worked the side of her neck with his tongue, all the while staring into my eyes.

Breathing felt weird in this dream too, like I could pick apart the different molecules in every inhale. But for some reason watching him got me all hot and bothered and I ended up panting like I was Maxine Fortenberry, chasing the ice cream truck down the road in the dead of summer.

His pointy teeth made another appearance and mine seemed to be attached to his because out they came again. And then I gasped in a breath and held it when he gently pierced her skin with them.

She moaned.

I moaned.

He moaned.

We were a bunch of moaners.

His cheeks hollowed as he pulled her blood into his mouth and the scent of it was driving me insane in my dream of insanity, so when he pulled away after one swallow and pulled me closer to her, I couldn’t resist doing the same.

And then the same thing happened all over again.

While still muted and foggy, I was sure I could sense her feelings. She was still a little frightened and a whole lotta turned on, but she was also annoyed because she’d been enjoying Eric-er’s attention and wanted it again.

And because this was the land of insane-believe, I felt a possessive fury sweep through me and growled in warning against her skin.

Now who’s the schnauzer?

He was mine. I didn’t know how or why. It didn’t even have anything to do with our earlier sex-a-thon, but I felt it to my dream core.

But the feelings I sensed from her were much easier to handle than the man’s thoughts of dying, so I continued to drink her chocolate syrup blood because it was finally squelching the fire inside my body.

Well, there was another fire building, but it would take a Viking vampire’s hose to put it out.

And leading me to believe he really could read my thoughts, he wrapped his arms around me from behind and began rubbing his body against mine. It only added to the experience and I continued to drink until he pulled my head away and kissed me, with our tongues now sharing the flavor left behind.

“You have done well, my child,” he murmured when he finally pulled away. “Now watch.”

He pulled his body away from mine and moved back towards the woman I was already calling ‘Barbara’ in my head.

As in Barbara Hershey.

He tilted her head and licked over his wound, with the blood flow quickly staunching to a stop. He then pulled back and pierced his fingertip on one of his pointed teeth and rubbed the blood over her wounds, turning her head yet again so I could see the two puncture marks disappearing from her skin.

“We must heal our prey to avoid detection.”

I heard something that sounded like ‘vroom’ and ‘frost’ and a bunch of other gibberish-to-me mixed in, so I had no clue what he was trying to tell me verbally. But his actions led me to believe he was showing me how to make our dream bites disappear.

Was this really something I would need to know to carry over into my next weird ass dream?

Maybe I would turn into An American Werewolf in Stockholm in the next one?

Christ, I hoped not. I was just glad I’d taken the time to shave everywhere I would want to be shaved earlier that day and it carried over into my dream.

I’d hate to spend dream eternity as a stubbly vampire.

I’d also learned to appreciate the little things in life, even in my dreams.


Her hunger was still present but not nearly as debilitating as it had been. I’d thought to let her drain the woman completely, but she had a remarkable level of control for a newborn and when her body’s needs turned sexual, I saw no reason to not reward her with my affection for doing so well. Feeding and sex were closely linked for our kind, but I would never force her to bend to my will.

However, I would gladly entertain her whenever she wished.

I hadn’t expected to feel so possessive over her, but because she was my child I supposed it was to be expected. But I hadn’t enjoyed watching her touch another man and hoped her agreement to feed from the woman was indicative of her preference.

For feeding.

I already knew very well she preferred a male lover.

And she’d felt nothing but pleasure interlaced with a little hostility while feeding from the woman, but it too quickly abated when I took her back into my arms.

So perhaps my child was mimicking my possessive feelings as her sire?

I couldn’t be sure. I’d certainly never felt that way towards my own Maker, but our circumstances were different. And I would make sure they would remain that way for all of eternity, with her experiences being the day to my impossibly dark night.

Yes. Fate had been kind by bringing me her.

I was still on alert for the human’s chirping guard, seeking out its master, so I didn’t want to spend any longer than necessary in the woman’s presence. I needed to figure out where we would shelter for the day and hoped to come across somewhere I could acquire a sword. I was a warrior even as a human and I would not leave us undefended. I would teach my child how to swing a sword as well and together we would fight any and all who came at us.

But first we needed to be rid of the human.

I didn’t know what other powers her guard possessed, so removing her from our location seemed the most prudent. It didn’t seem to be able to fly since it hadn’t come after us and we would be impossible to trace by land since I’d flown her there. Perhaps by returning her to her previous location it would be enough to keep it at bay, so with that thought I commanded Soo-key once more to stay and took the woman back to the village by air.

When I returned I found her sitting in the grass, tossing a strange object up into the air and catching it again as she said, “Barbara must have dropped her cell phone.” And then holding the object still in one hand, she ran her fingertip over the front of it, causing it to light up as she said, “There’s a signal…I wonder…”

I moved to sit beside her, wondering what kind of magical device she held in her hand and watching as she tapped her finger over it before holding it to her ear.


I heard a man’s voice coming from the small object and wondered if it was powered by a pixie trapped inside. My Maker had told me of such things, but I’d never come across anything but Weres and had learned early on to not believe everything he said.

I’d learned the hard way.

But what would she need with a pixie?


“Niall?” I asked. I shouldn’t have been so surprised hearing his voice since I’d dialed his number, so I laughed adding, “I guess now you’re in my dream too!”

“SOOKIE?” he shouted, enough for me to hold the phone away from my ear. And because my dream was odd in every sense of the word, I could hear him just fine when I held it away from me as he asked, “Where are you? I’ve been worried sick!”

“You have?” I asked, thinking it was strange for him to be so worried about me in my dream.

“Of course I have!” he exclaimed. “You’ve been missing for three days! When we came in and found the room empty, we thought something awful must have happened to you when they stole the Viking’s body.”

“When who stole the body?” I asked and then decided to put dream Niall at ease by adding, “Nobody stole anything. Eric-er is right here with me.”

There’s was a long pause before he finally asked, “You have the Viking’s body? Why Sookie?”

“I don’t know,” I shrugged, even though he couldn’t see it. “I guess I fell asleep right as he woke up and then he turned into a vampire. He turned me into one too, so here we are and I can’t understand a lick of what he says.”

But I definitely understood other things his tongue did to me. Licking, among them.

“Sookie?” Niall asked, sounding concerned. “Where are you, dear. I want to come and get you.”

“I’m not sure,” I replied. “We flew here.”

“How did you fly without a passport?” he asked. “You left all of your things behind.”

“Eric-er can fly,” I answered, knowing I sounded insane, but what the hell.

It was my dream.

“Can you look around and describe to me what you see? A street sign perhaps? Or a storefront?”

“I’m smack dab in the middle of nowhere, Niall,” I laughed. “Quit worrying! I’m dreaming. You’re probably going to wake me up any second and then I’ll blush to the high heavens we even had this conversation even though you won’t know about any of it.”

Even Dream Me couldn’t admit to Niall the raunchy things I’d done with my Viking vampire lover.


“Sookie,” he said more sternly, making Eric-er growl softly at my side hearing it. So I pet his arm hoping it would soothe him and then I felt a little worried myself, hearing Niall softly add, “Sweetheart, I think perhaps your disease has spread more rapidly than we could have anticipated and it is what’s making you delusional. Please, just tell me where you are and I’ll come get you.”

Was I delusional?

Had I wandered off and now I was God knows where, imagining I’d been pillaged by a Viking?

I’d never get into heaven that way.

Feeling my panic set in, I turned to Eric-er and said, “Say something.”

“What?” Niall asked. “What do you want me to say?”

“Not you,” I hissed and poked Eric-er in his chest, saying, “You. You say something.”

It didn’t matter to me one way or the other what he said because I wouldn’t understand it anyway, but at least if Niall heard his voice then I knew I wasn’t delusional.

I was just dreaming.

But Eric-er was back to doing his Schnauzer impersonation, so I tapped his chest and said, “Eric-er,” before tapping on my own chest and giving him the universal ‘Say my name now goddammit!’ expression.


I was admittedly fascinated by my child’s magical box, but I could feel her rising panic and not knowing why, I gave her what I thought she wanted and said, “Soo-key.”

Did she worry I would forget her name?

“Sookie!” the trapped pixie shouted from the small magic box. “Who’s there with you?”

I took the object from her hand and gently shook it, but felt no rattling from within. Nor did I smell any other scents coming from it besides my child’s and the human’s, but perhaps the pixie’s magic kept it from my senses.

“The Viking,” my child sighed, with a strong wave of relief sweeping through her.

So I repeated her name again, saying, “Soo-key,” while looking into her eyes to let her know I would not forget.

She should not worry over such things.

“Sookie, please! Tell me where you are so I can come to you!”

The pixie sounded worried as well and I wondered how they knew one another, but my attention was drawn back to my child feeling her rising frustration when she said, “I. Don’t. Know! I’m dreaming! But maybe if I wish really hard you’ll just pop over here with me!”

She closed her eyes and seemed to concentrate before slowly opening them again and saying, “Looks like you’re gonna have to sprout wings or a magic wand because my dream wisher is broken.”

Her pixie seemed to sigh before he said, “You say you don’t understand the man you’re with. Is he Swedish?”

“Was Sweden formed a thousand years ago?” she asked. “You’re the scholar here. I’m just going along for the ride on your coattails, so you tell me.”

“It…it can’t be…I shouldn’t even entertain the idea…” he muttered and no other sound came from him for a long moment, but I felt my eyes go wide when he asked, “Can you understand me?”

Pixies could communicate in any language?

Her magic box was not only fascinating, but convenient, so I smiled and replied, “Yes.”

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46 comments on “Chapter 3 – Lost in Translation

  1. Jfozz says:

    Should be interesting when she realises she’s not dreaming.

  2. art4annie says:

    More more! This greedy wench over here is begging for more! Gimmy gimmy!!

  3. TMart says:

    This is great! I can’t until she realizes she’s not dreaming. LOL! Do they have Old Norse to English dictionaries?

  4. southgatrubie75 says:

    Two great chapters in one night!!! Whoop whoop!!! Thank you sweet lady!

  5. twodognite says:

    Simply AMAZING! I LOVE it! Happy Birthday to your grown-up baby!

  6. ozzo says:


  7. Oh. My. Godric! Should be interesting when Sookie realizes this is her new reality. Niall speaks old Norse which could help. But he is her father figure and he won’t be happy that she is a vampire…

  8. sakshichopra says:

    We were a bunch of moaners 😀 hahahhahaha

  9. So cool. Never would’ve guessed niall would be the interpreter. He really does need to pop over to them.

  10. aolani08 says:

    Okay this is strange I hope she wakes up soon and realize he saved her life by death. I know with Sookie she is going to be angry at first but her Viking will calm her down

  11. kleannhouse says:

    damn what is she going to do when she realizes it is not a dream and she is a vampire, who is no longer sick? will Niall tell her what he is saying to Eric-er? looking forward to more KY

  12. Tiffany says:

    Holy crap its getting real and I love it!! The part about them all being moaners made me think of you scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream. Lol

  13. Ara827 says:

    Reading this is far too entertaining! I love how he interprets what she is trying to tell him and how the world is! So funny! Can’t wait until they actually start understanding each other a bit more!! Looking forward to the next update!!

  14. Trubie35 says:

    So Awesome!
    Thank you!

  15. Oh my goodness! This story is a pocket full of awesome. No, eff that. It’s a pocketbook full of awesome. No, scratch that. It’s a pocket universe full of awesome and I can not get enough of it. Hurry hurry! Write more please!!!!!

  16. Trish says:

    You. Are. Brilliant.

    Two updates in one night? And on Supermans birthday to boot?!

    *read in the voice of Wayne and Garth*
    We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy! We’re scum! We suck!!!

    Well maybe I am dreaming that it’s MY birthday and not Superman’s?! Boy oh boy… Perhaps that second tall boy Limearita wasn’t the best idea tonight?! Who cares, I will have a reason to re-read this in the morning ;). (As if I ever need an excuse… I can’t drag my addicted ass away! ) I may not be an alcholic or a druggie, but I am indeed addicted to everything that seeps out of your fuck awesome brain and on to this blog. This is the one addiction that I REFUSE to ever give up! Perhaps it is Rita talking, or maybe it’s a Screaming Blue Viking but I just want to tell you that I Love You.

  17. fanficglo says:

    Da da da….. I wonder how much longer till Sookie realizes she’s not dreaming. Oh, & if I had had any piece of Eric-er I’d be more than a little possessive!

  18. Fey says:

    OMG!! A Viking universal translator. Lololol. Now we need a sonic screwdriver.

  19. lostinspace33 says:

    I love this story so much!

  20. A bilingual pixie, how lovely ! Your imagination just blows me away.

  21. Adriana says:

    oh my god, these two are like the Abbott and Costello of vampires.

  22. Loftin says:

    Squuueeeals! Love it! Hopefully Niall will actually have a conversation with Erikr and then translate for Sookie.

  23. valady1 says:

    This gets better and better with each chapter. Love the way her logical brain refuses to accept her new reality and instead constructs this elaborate dream world. And Niall is going to be the language (and time) bridge that Eric needs. I think once he believes what she has told him, he won’t be that upset with Eric for turning her. She was dying and now she has an almost limitless future. And a maker who is determined to be everything for her that his maker wasn’t for him…. And the picture of your son in his superman outfit was precious. They grow up so fast don’t they?

  24. murgatroid98 says:

    Hmm, I’m wondering what Sookie’s reaction will be when she figures out it’s not a dream. A fallen cell phone is a very handy thing. Now we have Niall helping them, hopefully. Like Eric said to himself, they need somewhere to rest for the day soon. I’m also wondering what Niall really knows. Nice chapter. I’m loving this story.

  25. cros8262 says:

    Hmmm. So is Niall a fairy prince in this story?! I wonder.

  26. luvvamps says:

    Niall to the rescue! This is going to get really interesting!

  27. Mindy says:

    So very fun. I’m so curious to see what happens next. I like E/S relationship so far. The language difference makes things tricky. I can’t wait to see what happens with Niall.

  28. itsamia71 says:

    So, so good. You really are the bees knees. Now we have three people in for a huge shock when the truth is revealed. The way you layer then humour over the sadness is wonderful. I can only hope this Sookie will be glad to have escaped her fate. Together she & Eric can help each other understand their new realities & make an awesome couple.

  29. redjane12 says:

    Pinch yourself Sookie! You are not in Kansas anymore girl…
    Eric and Sookie are SO LOST IN TRANSLATION it is not funny… Luckily Niall is the walking Rosetta Stone of old Nordic languages… I hope that as the curious scientist he is and as Sookie’s mentor he will protect them

  30. Holly says:

    So awesome! Sookie’s gonna freak when she realizes she’s not dreaming! At least she has an interpreter now!! 🙂

  31. Duckbutt says:

    Oh my –the pixie in the box –that’s so stinkin’ cute –I’ll have to remember that the next time my phone drives me to drink……
    Cute as hell…

  32. 19melanie78 says:

    There’s going to be some freak outs all round once Nial believes Sookie isn’t delusional, Sookie realizes this isn’t a dream and Eric realizes he has been frozen for hundreds of years! I hope it doesn’t go too badly. They’re so adorable in their cluelessness!

    Love this story and your son’s superman pic! Glad he has learned to inhale a whole pizza in record time too because I’m greedy for updates!

  33. Ilive2read says:

    on my sons 18th he devoured a ton of crab legs in record time and then spent the rest of the night with his g/f while his mommy cried about not having a little baby boy anymore. You are def handling the growing up much better than I lol. Niall speaking in old Norse is not going to help her thinking it is a dream. Cannot wait to see her reaction to find out she is not dying but is now going to live forever.

  34. askarsgirl says:

    Great great chapter and I still smile when Eric-er calls Sookie, Soo-key:) Too cute!

  35. Shandiii says:

    loved it can’t get the image of Maxine Fortenbury chasing the ice cream truck out of my head

  36. baronessjai says:

    LOL magic boxes and Maxine fottenberry chasing the icecream truck omg! I’m loving this…see ya next any chapter 😉

  37. GB says:

    Uh o…Not sure how extra folks chasing after the missing viking will be good

  38. Rayne says:

    I’m liking this too. Your a talented lady. Kudos

  39. tatie87 says:

    I’m really enjoying the plot of this story so far. It’s like Encino Man meets AU TB. I can’t wait to read more!

  40. lilydragonsblood says:

    OMG!!! this story just gets better and better!!!…..’eric-er’ is just sooooo ungh… *sways around swooning*… and the magic pixie box? oh my, your imagination…. can’t wait for more!…. this story would make one helluva movie!!!….. actually, all of your stories would…. I bow in the presence of your phenomenal talent…. much love, lily xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  41. gwynwyvar says:

    Oh my freaking hell. That… that’s just awesome. And Niall needs to be glamor ed really quickly!

    After he becomes interpreter for a while lol

  42. vamplover669 says:

    Sookie is gonna get quite the wake up call soon! The pixie in the magical box was funny thank goodness Niall can speak Old Norse.

  43. hartvixen123 says:

    I love this story! Sookie thinks she’s dreaming and Eric doesn’t understand the new inventions around him. Haha. Sookie’s in for a rude awakening, especially if Niall discovers where she is.

  44. lilydragonsblood says:

    this re-read is awesome – I had forgotten the ‘magic pixie box’….hilarious!

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